Dad’s Bedtime Tales Newsletter 500

DBTN 500 Review pages

Dad’s Bedtime Tales Newsletter 500, released May 25, 2024. Subscriptions purchased in May 2024 include this issue.

  • Go Wash Grandpa’s Car • When Kyle moans, “There’s nothing to do,” Dad tells him to go wash Grandpa’s car. Kyle grumbles. But he goes. And he can’t believe the family secrets Grandpa tells him.
  • Swamp Suds • Swamp Suds beer is jack off beer. It gives your balls a warm glow. So when Toby hears that ol’ farmer Coonz gives his farmhands Swamp Suds beer, he knows which farmer he wants to work for this summer.
  • The Science of Shucking Corn • At Maximus Military Academy for Men, they use the science of shucking corn to determine which boys need remedial masturbation lessons. It’s a thing.
  • Buns of Steel • Dad is not a happy camper. The principal had to call him in again to lecture him about his son, Connor’s bad behavior. But Uncle Zev wonders if all the lad needs is for someone to fuck his brains out.
  • Pea Patch Tubers • Evid is surprised when he gets a plot in the nearby pea patch. He applied three years ago. He doesn’t know anything about gardening. But pea patch gardeners Trent, his son Ralph, and grandson Slade know a lot. And it isn’t long before they are sucking on Evid’s tuber. And smothering his nose with their balls.

Art in Dad’s Bedtime-Tales Newsletter 500 is by Lord Iron and Shigeru.